FUNNY THOUGHTS

When people say, "I'm so tired it's not even funny" or "my head hurts so much it's not even funny", why would it even be funny in the first place?

If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?

Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait'? Then just the leftovers from the people that got there first?

"Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?

Why aren't marbles made of marble?

Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

Can you get cornered in a round room?

Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?

Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?

How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?

Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?

How come you play at a recital, but recite at a play?

If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?

Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been
free?

If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?

Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

Why aren't safety pins as safe as they say they are?

Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?

Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are both the same number of letters?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do you find something funny? When obviously we do?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your
thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going too?

Why do people say, "you've been working like a dog" when dogs just sit around all day?


If money is the root of all evil then how come churches ask for it?

If Pringles are "so good that once you pop, you can't stop" why do they come with a resealable lid?

Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light?

Why do they say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?